But you see, it's not that people are indifferent about these two things. They don't just take it or leave it. Those that love them, passionately and unconditionally love them, while those that don't, don't just hate, they loathe. I've not met people who simply say "eh, it's not my thing" and leave it at that. It's pure hostility that comes out of those who don't care for it even if a lot of them haven't so much as read the books or watched the movies. The amount of anger they elicit frankly scares me. I want none of it directed at me so I cower in a corner pretending I know nothing of this Twilight phenomenon everyone speaks of, or the guy in the leading role.
When I first heard of Twilight I wanted nothing to do with it. I am an avid reader and though I read the occasional chick lit, I mainly read "acceptable", serious things, including the occasional feminist non-fiction. I had no interest in young adult vampire fiction. It was so not my thing and I couldn't understand what people were going on about.
I belong to an online book club and it was some of the women in that group who finally broke me down and got me to at least try the first book. I dutifully went to Borders and bought a copy. At the time, Breaking Dawn was about to be released and the book seller asked if I wanted to pre-order it. I rolled my eyes and told her I'd be surprised if I could get through the first one. Well, my story is much the same as most people who've read it and loved it: I started it on a Friday, was hooked right away and stayed up almost all night reading. The next day despite still being about 150 pages from finishing I went and bought the next one in the series, New Moon and eventually Eclipse. And yes, when Breaking Dawn was released about a week later, I showed up at midnight to get a copy.
At that time I didn't yet realize the hate that would come, only because the movie wasn't out yet. But then it was and it was time to choose sides. Hate or love it, but no room for indifference. That was about the time I realized I couldn't just admit I was a fan. I just couldn't. I could see what it looked like to the non-fans: The screaming fan-girls, the cheesy movie with the awful make-up and the bad acting. If I'm being honest I'll say I'm still not a huge fan of (the movie) Twilight. Too many things about it bother me, which don't seem stop me from watching it over and over again.
As far as the books went... well it was hard to argue with people who thought it was plain bad writing. In truth, I don't try to defend it. Do I believe it's prize-winning literature? No. But I do think it's fun and a great love story (which I'm a sucker for) with some very lovable characters who do what they're supposed to do: take my mind off of real life and transport me to a place I like spending time in.
Then, there are always those ridiculous debates about Bella being weak and Edward being too controlling and how these books give girls the wrong ideas about what relationships should be and so on and so forth. I just roll my eyes. I mean, really? But to be a fan of all that, well, how to justify it? I couldn't.
And then, there was Rob. I admittedly was not a fan of Robert Pattinson right away. Yes, I thought he was incredibly good looking but I was one of those who wasn't all that impressed with his acting and I just didn't get him. The messy hair, the awkwardness, the rather weird interviews he seemed to give. I don't know, I just wasn't so sure about him.
Since then, I've seen a lot of footage of his interviews and read a lot as well (more than I'd care to admit, truth be told!), and I finally do get him. I feel badly that so many people don't though. He's genuine, down-to-earth and humble. And his awkwardness now just makes him endearing. He's in an impossible situation under an incredibly bright spotlight and not everyone could handle that as well as he has. How he's managed to keep it together under all the scrutiny is beyond me, but quite impressive, really. I want him to do well and make great movies that will hopefully get some of the haters to ease up on him a bit. Yes, it'd help if sometimes he'd shave or brush his hair before doing an interview, but he doesn't and everyone just needs to get over that- what's that we're all taught at a young age? Never judge a book by it's cover? People would do well to take that advice.
For the longest time, I had no one to talk to about the books, movies or Rob because I knew of no one who was a fan. It probably didn't help that I was in the closet, but who knows, maybe they were in the closet too? I'm fairly sure I'm not alone in this.
I now know two fans: A good friend of mine who is a few years older than me, and her teenage daughter. It makes all the difference having someone to talk to who is a fan as much as I am, and doesn't make me feel like there's something wrong with me for enjoying these things. I think it's brought the three of us closer and that's another great little unexpected thing that's come from all of this. Though I know I will remain in my little Twilight packed closet, I will still continue to be a big fan, just (figuratively) hiding under my baseball cap and sunglasses.
Further Reading: This guy hasn't written anything in a long time, which is a shame, but what he has written in hilarious. Twilight Denial was the first time I realized I was not alone: Twilight Widowers Anonymous
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